HOST

Matt Poepsel, PhD

Vice President & Godfather of Talent Optimization

GUEST

Tyler Dickerhoof

Author, The Things We Hide

Most leaders believe that projecting confidence means hiding their doubts. But for Tyler Dickerhoof, author and personal development coach, the walls we build to conceal our fears and insecurities are the very things keeping us from connecting with, and truly leading, the people around us.

In this episode, Matt Poepsel sits down with Tyler to explore the deeply personal journey behind his new book, The Things We Hide. Tyler opens up about the defining moment at age 14 that shaped decades of intense, guarded behavior and the locker room epiphany that finally cracked it open. Together, they unpack why vulnerability isn’t weakness, and why the things we think we’re hiding are almost always already visible to everyone else.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • The Four Walls: How intensity, isolation, inactivity, and insensitivity show up as defense mechanisms rooted in fear and insecurity
  • Authentic vs. Toxic Vulnerability: Why “going first” as a leader creates psychological safety without oversharing or losing credibility
  • Windows in Your Walls: How to invite honest feedback and start seeing yourself the way others actually do
  • The BEST Framework: A practical model for showing up as your best self in service of those around you

Highlights:

(0:00) Meet Tyler Dickerhoof

(2:05) Why the things we hide block our ability to lead and connect

(8:10) The farming accident that changed everything

(9:58) Intensity as a wall and when strengths become liabilities

(13:50) The four walls: intensity, isolation, inactivity, and insensitivity

(16:11) Putting windows in your walls and asking what others see

(18:50) The BEST framework and leading by example

(25:11) Three pillars: recognize, own, and reframe

Resources:

Visit Tyler’s website: tylerdickerhoof.com

Pre-order The Things We Hide: thethingswehidebook.com


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Created in partnership with Share Your Genius: shareyourgenius.com