Why “I’ll Be Happy When” Holds Leaders Back (feat. Jay Abbasi)
Jay Abbasi is a global keynote speaker, TEDx speaker, coach, and former Tesla leader who helps professionals thrive under pressure without burning out. At Tesla, he led national training programs for over 1,000 employees, and has since coached leaders at Google, Amazon, TikTok, Wells Fargo, and many more. He's been featured in Forbes Founder, Authority Magazine, and Medium, and is the host of the top-rated podcast Unstuck with Jay Abbasi. Blending corporate experience with deep expertise in mindfulness, resilience, and well-being, Jay offers a powerful message: success isn't about avoiding challenges, but mastering them with clarity, energy, and purpose.
HOST
Matt Poepsel, PhD
Vice President & Godfather of Talent Optimization
GUEST
Jay Abbasi
International Keynote Speaker, High-Performance Coach, Resilience Expert
Jay Abbasi was 40 pounds overweight, his marriage was falling apart, and he was working himself into the ground for a promotion in finance. It took the sudden death of his father to make him ask the question that now drives his work: do I have to sacrifice joy and happiness for achievement? Years later, Jay has an answer, and it comes with a formula.
Matt Poepsel sits down with Jay Abbasi, CEO and Founder of The Conscious Professional, to take apart the idea that leaders have to pick between results and wellbeing. Jay spent years leading Tesla’s national training program before building a coaching practice that now includes leaders at Google, Amazon, and Wells Fargo. He and Matt dig into the “I’ll be happy when” trap, then Jay walks through a hole in the jungle that shows what empathy looks like when it gets someone out. A Lego exercise at Tesla proves how often leaders hold onto the card instead of handing it over. From there, Jay lays out his resilience formula in a specific order: energy plus space plus choice. They land on “mind freeness,” 15-minute meetings, and why every ambitious leader needs to get more bored.
What you’ll learn:
- Joy as fuel: Flip “I’ll be happy when” into “I am happy now,” and treat joy as what powers every step up the mountain.
- Honesty is kindness: Sitting in the hole with a struggling employee keeps you both stuck. Tie the rope to the tree trunk, reach down, and have the hard performance conversation.
- The resilience formula: Protect your energy first, build in space second, then choose how you respond. Jay argues the order matters, and so does a calendar full of 15-minute meetings.
- Delegation protects energy: Holding onto everything feeds control and ego. Handing over the card frees you to do the work only you can do.
Highlights:
(00:00) Meet Jay Abbasi
(02:33) What makes high performers unhappy in the first place?
(04:11) “I’ll be happy when” versus happy now
(05:39) The other extreme: happy but not performing
(09:16) Honesty is kindness
(12:20) Can you be friends with your employees?
(17:58) The resilience formula: energy plus space plus choice
(21:48) The Lego house and the card you won’t hand over
(24:53) Is space a calendar problem?
(29:54) Nothing is life or death
(31:45) Are you smarter than AI?
Resources:
Follow Jay on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayabbasi/
Visit Jay’s website: https://jayabbasi.me
Listen to Jay’s podcast, <i>Unstuck with Jay Abbasi</i>: https://jayabbasi.me/podcast
Follow Matt on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mattpoepsel/
Subscribe to The Predictive Index on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ThePredictiveIndex
Created in partnership with Share Your Genius: shareyourgenius.com
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